8/11/20

America the Colossus



                                           




                                                      

Over the past few weeks, Henry had recurring dreams of casinos, hotel rooms, swimming pools, cheap suitcases filled with dirty laundry, hand-sized Thai souvenirs made of bamboo, and long printed banners the width of a Cadillac with Pepsi or American flag logos on them.


His Cuban wife, Lucia, is an occultist who reads coffee grounds and tarot cards, so he asks her to interpret his dreams, she tells him,


be careful darling, dreams of dirty laundry mean you have a health problem you need to take care of. Gambling dreams are a warning to stop taking risks and change your lifestyle, but the good news is you can move on because the damage is already done.


Lucia's explanations of his dreams are unsettling. The phone rings, Henry picks up the handset, it’s the editor of HEADBANGER Magazine, Dave Spleen,


hello, 


Lucowski baby, Big Apple readers loved your stories— Level 5 or Worse and Rednecks Love a Freak Show, you seem to be gaining steam. Anyway, how bout a bit on William Burroughs? Cheers my man, gotta go, gotta deadline to meet.


The tribe’s on the front porch of their Key West bungalow enjoying Formosas and Eggs Florentine. The Chihuahuas Che y Mia beg for food as Pedro the woodpecker munches watermelon seeds with diced fruit. It upsets Pedro if the girls shell his watermelon seeds, and he lets them know it by stomping back and forth on the porch, protesting their thoughtlessness. 


Over the past few years, Lucia and Summer Wynd have become gourmet cooks, they read cookbooks, cooked at home every day, and loved things culinary. 


They were cooking more vegetarian meals as well, Henry would eat what was served and had no opinion on vegetarianism.


This morning the girls used English muffin-sized slices of breaded fried eggplant instead of Candian bacon, which they considered toxic. Also, adding fresh boiled rosemary in place of spinach in the hollandaise sauce.


The tribe gave up eating pork and beef after seeing pictures of devasted pigs with desolate looks on their faces in Whole Earth Magazine. The poor creatures lived awful lives, they're intelligent, more intelligent than dogs. 


Henry, Lucia, and Summer Wyng weren't vegetarian, they ate free-range chicken, seafood, or eggs occasionally. And, they had a gut feeling that processed cheese was nasty stuff, so they didn't eat it.


Yes, they were eating healthier but they continued to suck down booze like the earth was going to be hit by a meteor at any moment, pummelling out of its atmosphere, falling into the troposphere in flames as all aboard perish.


Henry had recently read William S. Burroughs’s book, Junky. A book that would have been published a decade later without the help of Allen Ginsberg, who helped William edit the novel and pounded the pavement with the Junky manuscript in hand, hitting up dozens of Big Apple publishing houses. 


Summing up Burroughs’s writing style was knotty for Henry. Junky is a story about William's life as an addict in the late 30s. The book is comparable to a Beethoven Concerto— as powerful today as it was when it was published decades ago.


Allan Ginsberg writes in the forward of the 1976 edition of Junky  about his experience showing the manuscript to the Doubleday Publishing  editor, Jason Epstein, who commented, 


Allen, if the book was written by Winston Churchill it might be interesting, but, Burroughs's prose is undistinguished. 


William's prose style wasn’t in your face, but he could airbrush a mental picture of a scene better than anybody in the business.


Publishing houses in the early 50s were spooked by the Junky manuscript— at the time there was boo koo paranoia in the air thanks to the Federal Bureau of Narcotics, so much that if you were overheard by a narc on a bus talking about ganja, or tea as they called it then, you could be taken to jail.


Finally, Ace Books, a pulp fiction outfit that primarily published science fiction, printed Junkyin 1953. William Burroughs received an 800 dollar advance on the 1st edition, 100,000 copies. The publishing house packaged the novel in a shabby paperback manner, a garish 50s cover illustration of a man holding his wife and slapping her because she threw away his heroin, looking like a panel of an Archie comic book. 


In that dope was a radical topic in the early 50s, a number of legal disclaimers were printed in the preface of the 1st edition of Junky, disassociating Burroughs with Ace Books because the novel was an out and out admittance that he was involved in criminal activities. 


Allen Ginsberg ends his 1976 forward writing—


The Junky text was printed and read over the next decade by a million cognoscenti—who did appreciate the intelligent face, the clear perception, precise bare language, direct syntax, and mind pictures— as well as the enormous socio-logic grasp, cultural-revolutionary attitude toward bureaucracy and law, and the stoic cold-humor’d eye on crime.


This spot-on description of Burroughs prose style is by far more penetrating than anything Henry could come up with— of course, Allen Ginsburg is posthumously on the list of the greatest poets of the 20th Century.


More than a few of Henry’s pals, freelance writers who contributed to HEADBANGER Magazine, felt his writing style and the writers he admired were out of the ark. 


He read piles of books by authors and poets of the 20th and 21st century, mostly realistic fiction. He enjoyed variations on the genre as well, notably, Gabriel Garcia Marquez's magic realism style.


Or, Pablo Neruda and W. B. Yates, a Latino, and a Brit, threw romantic poetry out the window in favor of modernism— an unromantic, poetic scrutinization of the state of British society after WW1, and the politics of The Bolshevik Revolution.


Henry couldn’t wrap his head around horror, spy, mystery, or romance novels. 


Now here’s the rub, his contemporaries figured contemporary readers thirsted for horror, spy, mystery, and romance novels— writers such as J.K Rowling, John le Clarre, Anne Rice, Mickey Spillane, and the living embodiment of Edgar Allen Poe, Steven King.


His pals insisted horror, spy, mystery, and romance novels are the future and the genres are where the money is. Saying realistic fiction, the Beats, Hemingway, and such, are dead, festering in a bygone era. Telling Henry his mania for realistic fiction was comparable to— trying to push water uphill.  


As he manically pushes water uphill in the face of the horror, spy, mystery, and romance novels of the world. Henry rages heathen like, why, he’d cut off an ear like Van Gogh, or in the fashion of William Burroughs, sever the end joint of his little finger— self-mutilating proof of his foaming mouth passion for realistic fiction.


Junky is a living canvas about the hard-boiled lives of the dopeheads living in 1930's junkdom, the action revolves around Burroughs grim life as an addict. 


The meat of the book's text is as close as William could get to his actual experience as a heroin addict. 


He created a fictional conception of himself in Junky known as William Lee. 4 years later, he was a character in Jack Kerouac's breakthrough book On the Road, Old Bull Lee. 


While Burroughs was living in Tangiers in the late 50s, his sense of self became shadow-like, he began seeing himself as a fictional construct as he was in Junky and On the Road, signing letters— El Hombre Invisible.


Throughout his book Junky, William references his wife Joan Vollmor without mentioning her by name, cooling labeling her my wife as though she was an unworn overcoat in his closet. 


2 decades after Junky was published Burroughs became a poster boy for misogyny. Of course, there are those who consider misogyny a queer trait, but Burroughs seemed to be singled out. Most likely, because he unwittingly murdered Joan Vollmor while attempting to shoot a glass off her head during a night of drunken rivalry in their Mexico City bungalow.


The couple's marriage was built on literary zeal and convenience because William was openly homosexual.


Junky like The Catcher in the Rye is a 20th Century parable of alienation in the modern world. William’s depicts junkies existing from fix to fix in heroin zones as,


invisible, dematerialized and boneless


as he lives in a soulless body going through the motions of being alive.


William Burroughs never recovered from heroin addiction, he was physically dependent on Methadone at the time of his death in Lawrence, Kansas, while living with his beloved cat and his personal secretary, biographer, and literary executor, James Grauerholz. 


 Henry, Lucia, and Summer Wynd are apolitical, they didn’t know who the governor of their home state is and couldn't care. Lucia was in the process of getting a green card. She loved America because of McDonalds and Disneyland, because of the overabundance of food goods available in supermarkets, and she felt free in the US. 


Henry and Summer Wynd had never voted, figuring, the politicians who won would work hard to enrich themselves and their cronies and the lives of out of the loop Americans would stay the same.


During the Viet Nam war, he pulled a high number in the draft lottery, 358, luckily spared from the ordeal of having to go to war.


He wasn’t anti-American, but when it came to patriotism he couldn’t feel it— similar to the emptiness he felt during times he was supposed to be loving. 


He’d seen awful images of physically disfigured soldiers in veteran hospitals on PBS documentaries which spooked him. 18-year-old boys charging full tilt, throwing their bodies in harm's way, ground up like hamburger meat because they bought into the party line—


save the world from the Communist expansion. 


After fighting for 15 years the NVA knocked the giant Lockheed C-18 bombers out of the sky with sticks and stones. The pint-sized cannon fodder in black PJs won alright and Viet Nam was united under Communism. 


Decades after the war, Viet Nam is as capitalistic as America. And, the logjam of human suffering and waste on both sides of the war is water under the bridge. Pale death has moved on to the middle east, so there’s another cause to save the world from, Islamic terrorism, the new Hitler. 


Bigger people than Henry were in place to decide the right or wrong of war, and only history knows the truth.


But, there are few positive quotes out there on war, even celebrated generals didn’t care for it much. Hitler liked war though, describing it as—


The greatest of all experiences.


Of course, Hitler’s love affair with war ate him alive. By 1945 he was a cocaine and goofball addicted 50 yr old who shook uncontrollably, looking like an 80-year-old shadow. 


Civil War General William Tecumseh Sherman said this—


I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation. War is hell.

Hunter S. Thompson points out at the essence of war—

The towers are gone now, reduced to bloody rubble, along with all hopes for Peace in Our Time, in the United States or any other country. Make no mistake about it: We are At war now & with somebody & and we will stay at war with that mysterious Enemy for the rest of our lives.


Henry’s personal favorite is William S. Burroughs’s thoughts on war—


This is a war universe. War all the time. That is its nature. There may be other universes based on all sorts of other principles, but ours seems to be based on war and games. All games are basically hostile. Winners and losers. We see them all around us— the winners and the losers. The losers can oftentimes become winners, and the winners can very easily become losers

America has been at war 239 years out of the 299 years of its existence, and the 40 peaceful years are marked by saber-rattling and covert bushfire warfare.


The US budget is primarily divided into two categories— mandatory and discretionary. The mandatory category is aligned with butter while discretionary includes defense and is associated with guns.


Guns and butter— In America, fatty edibles and pistols are big business. 


Americans who care or have an itch have been spewing gobbledygook in a political Chinese fire drill since 1776. The mind-fuck session swings pendulum-like from left to right to center, and back again. The debate never stops and is never resolved.


Dourness aside, Henry was wonderstruck by America, he saw the kinetic open all night neon light peninsula as a dazzling and maverick happening, the promised land— the rough and tumble home of the creative elite of cinema, art, fashion, music and computer technology.


America, it's a fountainhead of— hula hoops, muscle cars, cars with fins, Disneyland, Las Vegas, Harleys, Winnebagos, million-dollar lottery winners, infomercials, Ron Popeil's spray-on hair, homemade pies, George Foreman selling everything in the book on TV, fast food served posthaste, egg rolls, Mohamed Ali, Liberace, Elvis, Ray Charles, Evel Knievel, and Malcolm X, why, it's all this and more, an ongoing show, it's America the colossal.

7/28/20

Level 5 or Worse






During the month of September 1987, the summer heatwave ended and Henry's took Stephen King’s advice—

READ IF YOU WANT TO WRITE.

Henry was reading like a bat out of hell on The Stephen King Speed Freak Reading Jag as he called it.
Having read the paperbacks— Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas by Hunter S. Thompson, Factotum by Charles Bukowski, Raymond Carvers’ Cathedral, and Fred Exley's' book, A Fan's Notes, a wild romp centered on Exley's passion for Quarterback Frank Gifford and the New York Giants, juiced by his bouts in the nuthouse and constant drinking. 

Stephen King’s advice on writing had in some way changed Henry, although it was unclear how. 

Take his tip for aspiring writers not to take a creative writing course resulting in scores of English professors being laid off all over the country. 

Henry realized while on The Stephen King Speed Freak Reading Jag that introductory book formatting is a waste of paper. 

John Q. Reader opens his newly purchased book, clamoring to read his favorite author, but there are pages of literary red tape to page through— 

Half-title page
Title page
Copyright page
Dedication
Epigraph 
Foreword
Table of Contents
Preface
Acknowledgments
Introduction

Finally, after thumbing through the 20 introductory pages, including 2 mysterious blank pages, having to read a two 
faced forward written by an eminent individual who hopes the book will tank— John Q. Reader is finally at the meat of his book, savoring the ideas of his favorite author.

And, the sad truth is the paper used by publishers in introductory book formatting causes the deforestation of 100s of acres of spruce, pine, and hemlock trees every year.

Why not print books and periodicals on wafer-thin, high test ganja paper you could roll joints with when you finish the book?

He also had read a few pages into Ballets Without Music, Without Dancers, Without Anything, a great title for a book by the French writer Louis-Ferdinand Céline, but he got seasick, so he threw the book overboard.   

Celine’s a nature freak who writes as though he’s tripping on mushrooms, the first chapter of Ballet… is underwater. Reading it you feel like your flowing through currents at sea bottom— encountering fish and other ocean creatures with human personality traits— they’re lazy, humorous, selfish, mean, greedy, caring, uncaring, and so on. 
The sea creatures live in an oceanic society and must answer to the king of the sea Jupiter and his family—  Pluto, Juno, Ceres, and Vesta, who rule the ocean.

Celine writes in a hectic style as though he’s hyped up, excited about something, typing 7 or 8 words then spacing using 4 periods ….  over and over again, by page 7 you feel a migraine coming on. 

While reading Ballets Without Music, Without Dancers, Without Anything you sense there’s a Francophile secret that Celine or the French aren’t letting English language readers in on, you need to speak French to be admitted to their club.

Henry's interrupted as he types naked in his office by his Cubano wife, Lucia. She reminds him he has an appointment in an hour with Dr. Pedro Alvarez in downtown Key West. 

Why do Mothers all over the world say? 

Put a clean pair of underwear on when you go out, you never know. 

Are Mothers of the world referring to the possibility of ER technicians seeing butt flowers on your undies? 

Lucia bathes and washes Henry, babying him, shampooing his waist-length black and white hair, soaping him up all over his body, helping him out of the tub, drying him with a large cotton towel, then wrapping the towel around his hair like a turban. 

He looks good at 45, lean, not muscular with olive skin. Lucia oils his long hair with patchouli oil, lacing it in a single braid. 

He's wears cut off fatigues, a purple Levi shirt, and a pair of Rainbow flip flops, he hadn't worn a tie for years and he wondered if the suits of the world had trouble breathing?

He'll ride the tribes Vespa scooter to the clinic. Key West is 18.70  kilometers squared so things are centralized— you can travel from one part of the city to the other in less than 20 minutes. 

Dr. Alvarez's clinic is in an ugly mall. Henry parks his Vespa on the sidewalk in front of the doctor’s office. The mall looks like every other mall built in the 60s, single-story design with sterile modern architecture— made of concrete, cream brick, and laced like a shoe with round metal beams.

Inside the clinic there are 14 people waiting, looking uncomfortable, sitting in unfriendly hard plastic chairs, the chairs, like the architecture of the mall, are a symptom of 60s minimalist design.

2 alluring receptionists, bleach-blond Dolly Parton look-alikes wearing form-fitting nurses outfits emit color in the room, contrasting the lint grey backdrop of the drab and emotionless patients.

Henry sits down and fantasizes, eyeballing the alluring medical assistants imagining they're porn stars on their off time, wondering what they look like naked. 

He initiates eye contact with one of the medical assistants and she ignores him, yawning and raising her arms, causing her breast to expand to basketball size. Then she puts a pen in her mouth like it's a cigarette, moving the pen in and out of her mouth. Henry is turned on and she knows it. Medical assistant number 2 says, 

Mr. Lucowski, the doctor will see you now,

She leads him down a hall, her ass tightens and twitches as she walks, her scented body floats a trail of Magnolia perfume in the air that embraces him.

In the office Dr. Alvarez is sitting at his desk, he has bushy eyebrows, curly black hair, and is wearing a starched white lab coat. Pictures of the doctor in Tibet with the Dalai Lama and Baba Ram Dung are on the walls. Henry feels he's in the presence of deity. The doctor asks, 

What seems to be the problem Mr. Lucowski? 

I've been having cramps and diarrhea once a week for the last year. 

Why didn't you come sooner?

I figured loose bowels cleansed my stomach and intestines like cayenne pepper do.

I'm concerned Mr. Lucowski that your stool consistency could be a symptom of something.

Like what? 

Colon cancer or worse,

What's worse? 

Level 5,

level 5 then what? 

Let's not put the cart before the horse Mr. Lucowski. I think it's best you go directly to The Lower Keys Medical Center for a series of blood tests, stomach X Rays, and a colonoscopy. 

I'd rather go home and eat a cheeseburger. 

I will tell Nurse Cockburn to call Dr. Zuckerputz, the oncologist, to schedule a probe.

The probe is intriguing Doctor, would you say it's pleasurable pain?

Doctor Zuckerputz will explain the procedure. 

Henry's bill is 250 dollars, he hands his Visa card to 1 of the strumpets in white. She ignores him, his problems are no concern to her. He could have colon cancer or worse, level 5 maybe. She sees this type of thing every day and it's nothing to her.

Outside he gets on his Vespa, there's a parking ticket on his motorbike. He notices a grinning mall cop who's flashing a mouth full of yellow teeth looking at him. The guy is skeletal, his black leather belt has extra holes punched in it to accommodate his narrow waist. His hair is slicked back with Vitalis and he's sporting a cheesy thin mustache.

Henry gets off the scooter and walks up to the rent a cop,  saying,

I suppose hassling people gives you pleasure.

Ahhh, it's my job, 

it's your job to make people miserable? 

No, not exactly, I ah, enforce mall policy.

I'm dying so you can shove the ticket.

Go ahead, do what you want mister, but you're gonna have to pay in the end.

I don't need high philosophy from a flyweight mall cop who makes 4 dollars an hour.

Henry rips the ticket into confetti pieces, tossing the bits into the air like it was new year's. The skeletal mall cop says as he jots down the scooter's license number on the inside of his palm, 

real funny mister, now I can write you a ticket for littering.

As he rides his scooter down Main he's mentally going through the 5 emotions people experience when they find out they're dying.

Denial— yes, indeed, flush the nagging death thoughts like a dead fly down the commode. 

Anger— sure, who wouldn't be angry mixing it up with Wild at Heart, Bobby Peru the rent a cop? 

Bargaining— with who, God? The doctors? I don't believe either of them.

Depression— are you kidding? The Hunter S. Thompson booze and dope regimen will get me through it— mass quantities of bloody maries, cocaine, hash, acid, and 8 fresh grapefruits a day.

Acceptance— Why bother, it's asinine, like talking about closure.

Noticing a local dive, Bobby's Monkey Bar, he parks in a nearby alley and goes inside. It's 2 PM, the place is dark except for a few lit, dust-covered Miller Beer signs— it's smokey inside and the joint is lined with barflies staring down at their drinks, struck dumb and tongue-tied.

At the rail, he orders a mug of Miller Draft and a shot of whiskey, dropping the shot into the mug Boilermaker style,
downing it and saying,

hit me again.

After 3 of the same, he feels up for probing.

On the Vespa again he makes it to the clinic in minutes, parking in the motorcycle parking lot this time.

Inside The Lower Keys Medical Clinic, a modern structure made of frosted ribbed glass with the feel of a ghostly cathedral, Henry goes to the information desk, saying one word, 

oncology,

He reeked of firewater, the receptionist raises an eyebrow and says, 

2nd floor, alcohol is strictly forbidden on the premise! 

OK, OK.

His run-in with Bobby Peru mall cop and the intrusive demeanor of the hospital receptionists was proof that society's changing— bureaucrats were becoming enforcers and inquisitors on the lookout, wary of— patients, customers, welfare recipients, people in parks, on bicycles, and anyone else because everyone's a suspect.   

Henry sits down in the Department of Oncology, the chairs are comfortable, padded. He's half in the bag, slouching in his chair, wondering if one of the enforcers in the nurse's station sipping juice stolen off of patients trays, and gossiping would reprimand him, telling him to sit up straight. 

Instead of putting on clean underwear as his long-gone mother had repeatedly told him to do, he wore no underwear— no underwear no butt flowers, no underwear as an act of civil disobedience.  

He fiddles away time by looking at the other patients, scrutinizing them for telltale signs of colon cancer or worse, level 5. The ones looking like sick birds were surly level 5, but not worse, yet. 

He didn't look them, his hair was long and shiny and his skin glowed, what was he doing there? He'd soon know.

When his name is called by a sullen medical assistant, another inquisitor, he follows her to Doctor Zuckerputz's office. 

Inside he sits in front of a long desk, an expensive mahogany desk. Golden framed photos of Zuckerputz's sailboat, Ultrasound, festooned the office walls. He figures if a doctor prescribed enough probes and ultrasounds he could buy an expensive yacht. The oncologist says, 

Mr. Lucowski after conferring with Doctor Alvarez we concur that you should take a series of tests, a blood test that will tell us how your kidney and liver are functioning, a stomach X-ray, and a colonoscopy. 

How about the probe? 

Sir, the colonoscopy is a probe done with a colonoscope. 

Nice 

That was the sum of it, Henry stands up and is escorted to the cashier offices. Cash, a major player in hospitals everywhere, because hospitals, doctors, nurses, pharma, insurance companies, and the medical equipment industries all know they have you by the balls when you're sick— it's pay or die, or die and pay anyway.

His number flashes at counter 3, he jumps up and hustles to the glass-enclosed counter. The cashier hands him a printed bill through an open area in the glass. He'll have to pay 1st, this ensures he won't make a run for it after the tests. The mood is hushed and of great consequence, the same feeling you get in a bank or a church.

The bill is a whopping 18,677 dollars, the colonoscopy is 11 grand, an hour of outpatient tests cost as much as a new Cadillac.

Henry looks at the teller, hands the bill back to her and says, 

How much for the 30 seconds I spent in Zuckerplatz's office staring at the pictures of his yacht?

The stone-faced cashier pushes a button and a page pops up from a printer, she hands it to Henry, 400 dollars, 

400 dollars? I was in his office for less than a minute.

Mr. Lucowski, Doctor Zuckerputz is a specialist so his fees are higher than a general practitioner. 

He hands her his Visa card and says,

I'm going home, eat a cheeseburger and drink myself to death, It cost too much to die in a hospital.

Back at the bungalow, he's happy to see his wife, Lucia, their lover Summer Wynd, the Chihuahuas, Che y Mia and Pedro the woodpecker, telling the girls,

I've been running around town all day chasing a red herring. Inches from being gobbled up and probed by the fraternity of white lab coats with their coyote smiles, shark skin wingtips, red gu-gu eyes, and megaphone mouths,  Summer Wynd giggles, 

what's with the drama baby, so how did the tests go? 

at 20 grand, the tests never made it to 1st base.